oh dear...

tickled pink and fancy free that's what single means to me. no shaving legs or bleaching hair. gaining weight? i don't care! i've got my toys and videos, pringles, twinkies and ho-hos. i don't worry if i'll swallow, get knocked up or lay that fellow. i spend my time at my desk writing crud that passed the test of pseudo-brains in this group. oh my! oh no! i needst go poop! ah, that's better. yes, by far. the top popped off *that* pickle jar. so quit your bitching, stop that mess! you could always have much, much less. just think! no don't! it's hard to bear. if you could not even get to here! no net. no porn. no IRC. now, it's clear, you start to see. so drink that beer, compose a post (which won't even get read by most) about your sad, pathetic life or that bitch who was your wife. we'll laugh and jeer and mock you well, especially if you don't know how to spell. this date is moot, it does not matter. what does is whether you don't splatter your monitor with that spunk while gawking at that homo hunk. so whip it out and beat it hard. *yawn* i've had enough as the bard.