you know when...

you know when you just can't muster the energy to talk? when you look at your IM list and see all those people you consider friends, or at least conversational acquaintances, and you can't think of anything beyond "hey" to type to them? when you're actually relieved that someone cancels a lunch date so that you won't have to make conversation? you know when you just want someone warm to show up at your door with their arms open, waiting for you to fall into them? when there are no expectations or ulterior motives? when they just know that you need to have someone physically close? you know when everything just seems so big and overwhelming? when you can't seem to start anything because the end feels so far away? when you're throttled by the fear you won't be good enough? when you can't even begin to imagine feeling excited about anything again? you know when it's time to get up off your ass and do something about it? yeah, it's that time.